Honour Your Father And Mother

A while ago, I went to see my doctor for a brief but painful procedure. As many doctors do, he tried to distract me from the pain. Knowing I’m a pastor, he explained how he has a bad relationship with his father and asked, “Should I forgive him?”

When God wrote the Ten Commandments, He split them into two groups: five about relating to Him, and five about relating to other people. The fifth commandment in the first group, “honour your parents” (Exodus 20:12), seems to break the trend. But it doesn’t; our deep connection to our parents profoundly affects our relationship with God.

God chose our parents specifically for us. Whatever your parents are like, God is trying to teach you something good through your relationship with them. In general, honouring your parents means seeking that good, whether it’s hard to find or super easy. If we aren’t willing to look for the good in our earthly parents, we’ll have a hard time finding it in our Heavenly Father, and a relationship with Him becomes impossible.

What does honouring your parents look like? For children, it means obeying them even when you don’t want to (Ephesians 6:1-3). For adults, it means listening to them even as you make your own decisions and caring for them however you can (Proverbs 23:22). Your parents aren’t perfect—neither are you—but God wants you to learn from them anyway. You honour Him by appreciating that lesson and living it out in your life.

So how did I answer my doctor’s question? He should absolutely forgive his father. Our parents’ lives are blessings to us. Seeing them as such is essential to trusting God and becoming who He made us to be.

Watch the full sermon here.